Latest Episode

June 20, 2019

Episode 55

Episode 55

For the 2nd week in a row, an unwanted visitor forcefully ejaculated themselves into our mix. This week, our ejaculate is Beau. He'll be calling in later in the show to ask a question that we clearly already asked back in 2016 during our 1st listener special. He calls himself a fan, but that's some shit if you can't recall all 200+ questions during our show's history at a whim. 

Anyways, here's a link to some shit that we spoke about this episode. It's The Office theme but set to nazi Germany just to prove literally anything exists. I forgot when we talked about that, but I am not known for making super accurate, detailed, punctual show notes. What you see is what you get. 

Oh shit, Dave, isn't there some other way to support your dank show? I already donated to Patreon and got that sweet extra bonus episode per month for just $1 per month. Well yes, you can. We just opened up OUR FUGGIN' MERCH SHOP where you can buy some shit branded with our puppet faces on it. Shirts only come in size S-XL for now (sorry obese fanbase). 

That's enough shilling for ourselves for's our questions this week.

1) What are some minor inconveniences in first world countries that would mean nothing to someone living in a third world country?

2) How do you know that you've hit rock bottom?

3) How do blind people know that they're done wiping? 

- Side note........The Listener Special Part 1 already went over this. But again, fuckin' Beau seemed to have let that slip his mind.

4) Is swallowing cannibalism?

5) What household appliances can be transformed with 'smart' technology, and is it even worthwhile?


Here's some ways you can support your favorite goddamn show!

Consider being a Patreon donor. Bonus content is already being released and will be released once per month!
Voicemail: (815) 905-1138
Twitter: @ImpQuestionsPDC
Instagram: @TheImportantQuestionsPodcast

Also drop a review on your podcast directory of choice. That's cool too. Patreon boner/bozos get a bonus episode THIS Tuesday. Consider that if you're not one and then kill yourselves if not donating still. 

Recent Specials

The Listener Special

Your questions, answered.

May 09, 2019

The Listener Episode: Volume 5

What cocktail defines who we are?

Little mommy, big salami?

What is the worst item to put through the wash?

What is the best type of french fry?

What is the most supreme breakfast food?

The Lightning Round

We answer important questions, but more of them, faster.

November 26, 2018

The Lightning Round Volume 4

What is the evolutionary advantage of being ticklish?

What is the best use of $1 in current year?

If Steven Hawking is so smart, how come he is dead?

What would be the worst guard animal?

Haggis food review.

What is the least amount of money we would accept to have no hygiene upkeep for 3 months?

How Low

The show where we decide just how low we'll go...

April 20, 2018

Episode 9 - Suckin' Tapeworms From A Cat's Anus

What is the least amount of money we would accept to suck a tapeworm from a cat's anus?

About the Show

Discussing your shower thoughts and restless, racing brain droppings.

Learn more

We will play literally any voicemail. Leave us a message: (815) 905-1138